Nov 20, 2011
Appreciate the Enthusiasm
You know what pisses me off? I'll tell you what pisses me off. What pisses me off is that people tend to keep you from a hobby-or-or a passion. People are so fucking destructive that: no wonder there's no fucking peace in the world. BECAUSE EVERYONE IS SO DAMN COCKY! My mom tries to take my writing from me and now my music. Well, I wouldn't say now because she's done it before by erasing all my music from her iPod...that was devastating for me. That was like a supernatural disaster for me because it took a long time-and I mean it! A LONG TIME just to get that music. Of course, sometimes we have to grow up and move on. Now, that I'm fucking 16 years old, and that I'm writing a damn book involving two lesbians, my mom has a fit about it. Like I give a shit! I'm gonna keep writing, whether you like it or not! Even if I have to wait till I have a job of my own. I'M GONNA KEEP WRITING! And no one is gonna keep me from music. She doesn't seem to understand that we're individuals and we have our interests. And another thing, I've just turned 16. Do you know how hard it is just to have certain things your way? Like getting the perfect coffee or getting the perfect version of a song or trying to win desperately at Project Gotham Racing. Now, those are just small things that I desire. The big things-my mom won't let me have or let it happen. Like confronting my guidance councilor about what the fuck is going on or let me shopping for my own clothes or sleep the whole day! BECAUSE SHE SO DAMN BIPOLAR! I knew it! I knew it! I knew I should've gotten that book on how to deal with a person diagnosed with bipolar disorder. Because I can never please her. It's not my fault I was made from a damn man who doesn't give a shit about me. It's not my fault that I'm-WAS depressed. It's not my fault that I'm writing about two lesbians! Tell me, what the fuck is wrong with these religious people nowadays! They're so fucking hypocrite. They say they don't judge-that they're with God and that they worship God because He is powerful. Well, did you know that emotions are the fault in being gay? I'm not gay but I love gay people. I fucking love gay people. What is so fucking bad about that? Just because I hang out with gay people-I'm gay, too? What the fuck! I can never have decent life because I want to expose myself into curiosity! What's wrong with that? It's not my fault that this whole society and this country is so fucking sexual about ads and magazines. I have no problem with that but seriously, when or where the fuck are you gonna find a virgin girl or boy nowadays if everyone is exposed to sex? Where? The only virgins you'll ever find is in the hospital when a mother just gave birth to "Congratulations! It's a girl!" Fucking pathetic! And then parents expect to keep their daughter safe when sooner or later, SHE'S GONNA HAVE A BOYFRIEND! Not saying that I'll have a boyfriend because my self-esteem for a boyfriend is way low, dude. But come on! But you know what, I'm not worried about that because...(sigh) I am happy as fuck.
Life Stinks
I am...really really startin' to love life...or not. No. I'm really startin' to hate it. Major bullshit is really startin' to tear me apart. Seriously! And I have no idea was to do. I just wanna sleep all day...and do...nothing. I really love life. I really...really...REALLY LOVE LIFE. Because it's all bullshit...for reals.
Nov 15, 2011
Finally!
Life is such a BITCH! Fuckin' people and fuckin society and fuckin' school and fuckin'...ARRGGHH! Anyway, I talked to my best friend from junior high school who was (and still is) my bestest most bestest friend/hermanita! She such a great person. So, I talked to her about my situation for a bit and like she said: She talked some sense into me. Although, she sounded like my mom giving me a lecture...I still love her. And I understood her! I was IN NEED to talk to someone and I saw her in the chat list and I was, "Thank God, I found someone who can hear me out!"
Thank you, Hermanita! Love ya!
Thank you, Hermanita! Love ya!
Nov 9, 2011
Stupid Shit.
Well, I have a Facebook account and I also have a page that holds my music in it. Turns out that I can't seem to find the area where I add more music! That's stupid. Otherwise, they probably took the ad out and I can't put anymore music. That's stupid too! This Facebook stuff is really pissin' me off...seriously.
Nov 1, 2011
All of a Sudden...
After my decision of not going back to school, I am really starting to miss my friends and my favorite teachers...and the piano in the auditorium. I miss Elena, and Sabrina, and Shawn, and Crystal, and Crystal, and Cristal, and Sasha, and Sereena, and Victor, and Marlo, and Lizbeth, and Daniela, and Imani, and Mahogany, and Misty, and Elijah, and Brittany, and so many others that I can't name them all! I really miss them! And I miss Ms. Emn and Ms. Torres and Ms. Woods and Ms. Smith. I really do. But I'm not going back! Period. All the other teachers stress me out!
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